Having just paid property taxes, by myself for the first time, money is very tight right now. I've been planning fairly large scale changes in my budget to keep this from happening next year, staying prayerful and grateful for the abundance I have all around me and for the lessons in being frugal. But I totally missed God trying to tell me that it is in minding the small things that grace comes. This is true not only with money but with the changes I want to make in my life. Running three and a half miles at a strong pace without stopping is something that happens a little at a time. Changing the way I think about those I love happens the same way, as one by one I pry my fingers off their lives and let them be. Accepting those pennies, that small change, is a metaphor for life.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
So there's this thing lately about change. It started with pennies: in the mulch by the sidewalk on a run, actually on the sidewalk on another run, beneath my feet on the asphalt as I got out of my car, and somewhere else I don't recall. I remember thinking, someone else needs to find those and receive their "luck." Days later I saw a quarter, shiny and expectant, in the crease of the car seat. A dime a few days after that peeked up at me from the gray rubber seal of the washing machine. Then I found a quarter and a nickel together, and things got weird.
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2 comments:
1. How often do you write? When you do, what are your purposes?
Currently I write everyday. I have every day since December 30th, 2007. I made it my New Year's resolution to write everyday, because writing everyday for an entire year is one of the items at the top of my "things to do before I die" list. Also, being an aspiring songwriter, I needed motivation to just write lyrics regardless of whether or not I had music to go with them. I write because I enjoy writing, and I feel a great sense of accomplishment when I complete a poem or song or other form of clever/imaginitive writing. Before this year, I wrote mostly for school assignments, with little poems or short stories here and there, about once every two months.
2. What is your attitude toward writing? Do you ever do it because you want to?
I love to write, and I now write more because i want than because I have to. My attitude toward writing is that, unlike playing or listening to music, which serves as an escape the day's problems and conflicts, writing allows me to confront my problems head on and make myself happy by making something beautiful out of something that bothers me.
3. When you do write, how satisfied are you with what you are able to express (usually, often, sometimes, not usually, never)? What, do you think, contributes to your level of satisfaction?
Writing everyday, this number has gotten significantly lower...many of my entries are short lists or complaints in prose about the day's events. I'd say this year I write something I'm proud of, whether it be song lyrics, a poem, or a short story, about five to seven times a month. Before this year, most of the freelance fun writing I completed gave me great satisfaction, mostly because I only wrote on rare occasions in which I'd dedicate time and effort to the piece until I was proud of it.
4. How concerned are you with others reading your writing (very, somewhat, not really, not at all)?
I'm not really concerned with people reading my writing. I only have a few entries in my journal that really hark back to actual diary-like things, secrets and love intrests and other such thoughts (which at least one person, Erik, already knows in full detail). Even those I'm willing to share with friends and family most of the time...I'm very open about my feelings and my intentions almost all the time. So no, I'm not concerned with others reading my writing.
5. If you considered yourself a good writer, would you write more?
I do consider myself a good writer and because of that I suppose I write for fun. If I considered myself a bad writer, I probably wouldn't write as much.
6. If you had an opportunity to improve your writing, what specifically would you request help with?
I think I have a pretty good grasp on many styles of creative writing. I'm proud of most of my poetry, my short stories, and other creative works. I think there definitely is room for improvement, but I the only specific weak area I can think of in my writing is in scholastic essays...my introductions/conclusions are usually not great (mind you they're usually not bad either).
7. What advice about teaching would you give someone trying to help you learn?
This is a difficult question for me, because I've recieved an English education from schools and curriculums that span four states. I think I've had a great education, and I also think that Texas' school system is lacking in comparison to the other states in which I've recieved education. This, obviously, has nothing to do with the teachers, but rather the curriculum. I suppose the answer to this question must be to try to somehow find a way to offer help on different levels and subjects based on a student's knowledge of the English language. For example, I find English classes most beneficial when I'm given opportunities to write challenging and interesting pieces and improve my perception, thought depth, and higher-end rhetorical style. I think most students my age would be baffled by such assignments, because most students in Texas don't have the same grasp on basics, like grammar or spelling, or a love of learning (particularly in English), which I gained mostly from my education in other states. Those students should first be given foundational instruction so that they can feel confident in their writing and begin improving things like perception and style without being bogged down by bad grammer.
If you want to say anything else that might be helpful, please include that in your comment.
Ms. Iskra, I love your class, and you are one of the best English teachers I've ever had. Thus far you have done a great job of tailoring your instruction to each student's individual needs. You are very open-minded, level-headed, reasonable, clever, artistic, and kind; and for that I have thoroughly enjoyed your class thus far and will find it difficult to find a better English teacher in college. My writing has improved on so many levels simply because of the instruction, assignments, and encouragement I've recieved in your class. Thank you.
-Joseph Duemig
1. How often do you write? When you do, what are your purposes?
I write everyday. Throughout high school I tried to write as often as I could, but I found myself going months without writing a thing. Writing has always been something that has given me the greatest joy; finishing a work is one of the most amazing feelings I can think of. This year, to motivate myself, I made myself a promise/new year's resolution to write everyday, and so far, I've kept up with that save one sad day in march. My purpose for writing is simply to express myself. I've found that I'm most comfortable expressing myself through words, and I feel I have a lot of stories to tell and things I can do with my writing.
2. What is your attitude toward writing? Do you ever do it because you want to?
I adore writing. I write mostly because I want to, but sometimes for school (and even some of that is stimulating). But I truly love writing; it helps me in so many ways, and I am a big believer in the power of words to change things.
3. When you do write, how satisfied are you with what you are able to express (usually, often, sometimes, not usually, never)? What, do you think, contributes to your level of satisfaction?
I'd say often. Writing everyday means that obviously not every entry is going to be great, but it has definitely increased my number of works that I am truly proud of. I am most satisfied by completing a work and the feeling of accomplishment it gives me to know that I came up with my own idea and was able to put it into words (not always the best possible words, but words none the less).
4. How concerned are you with others reading your writing (very, somewhat, not really, not at all)?
I am not very concerned, if at all, with others reading my writing. In most cases, I'd say that's the point, but I will admit that some of my more journal-esque entries that just talk about my private life would be better kept secret. However, I am a very open person, and there are very few of these kinds of entries in existence.
5. If you considered yourself a good writer, would you write more?
I do consider myself a good writer, but always with room for improvement. I do think I write a lot because of my confidence in my writing, though.
6. If you had an opportunity to improve your writing, what specifically would you request help with?
I think the best thing I can do for my writing right now is just to immerse myself in the culture of writing. Like everything else, I believe writing has a culture of its own, and one needs to immerse oneself in it, bathe in it, to fully understand the best ways to express a feeling or idea or description etc. I think I need to participate in discussions about writing (and reading) to increase everything from vocabulary skills, to general understanding of the "right words," etc.
7. What advice about teaching would you give someone trying to help you learn?
I think teaching, especially in English has to begin at an extremely young age. I have received instruction on English at many different schools in 4 different states. I think the biggest thing a teacher can do to help a student of English learn is to cultivate their love of learning. In this sense, I think mostly legislation and administration is at fault, not teachers. I think many of my peers lost their love of reading or writing or learning in general a long time ago, and thus do not care (or care very little) about assignments given. I would prefer to see much more of an equality between teacher and student, allowing them to "play the same game" (words quoted from Philip Pullman, a British novelist). Students need to believe their writing has a purpose (other than just obtaining a ranking or grade). They need to know that their writing has meaning and that they can increase their skill in the language and that that skill can be used for GREAT things.
If you want to say anything else that might be helpful, please include that in your comment.
Of all the English teachers I've had throughout my primary and secondary educational career, you have shown the most genuine and passionate love for the English language. You conduct your class in a way that encourages and rewards progress, a way that helps every student on a rather intimate and individual basis, bringing out the best in each of us, and you have the flexibility, the level-headedness, the open-mindedness, and the artistic vision necessary to be a teacher of the delicate art of the English language. I've learned a great deal from you and I can only hope that my learning from you will not be limited to high school.
~Erik Duemig
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